For a long time as part of this blog series who is Leon Lewis Jr, I’ve really wanted to write a blog stating what is Leon Lewis truly afraid of, It’s funny because after lots and lots of thought it comes down to one word. But the humorous thing about that word is it’s not descriptive enough to truly relate how and why I fear certain aspects of life, love and career. The word I have been looking for the past six months is failure. It is no more complicated than that I am afraid of not being successful, which makes this whole concept of failure, more difficult since I set my own standards for what is or isn’t “successful” in my own life. Listed down below will be the different attributes of what makes up failure in my mind. I hope that it will help you understand how I got to this unique word to describe my true fears.
I have a hard time drawing a line of where does my responsibility to family begins and end.
There is no bigger regret in my life, then me being mad at my grandmother near the end of her life because I felt she was always into my business. If there was anything I could take back it would be that childish notion that a individual who truly cares about you, “We’ll always seem like a busybody or a nosy person”.
About 15 years ago, I was holding a conversation with one of my brothers in Brooklyn. As he was bragging about the $500 he had spent on his outfit and new sneakers. He paused to say that his baby’s mother had a court order against him for child support for his two sons of $25 a week. Almost simultaneously he reached into his pocket and pulled out a wad of money probably in the neighborhood of $10,000. Before I could catch myself I heard me say you should put all the money in A envelope in rate this young lady a note apologizing that she ever got involved with a trifling individual like yourself. – – – I don’t believe I’ve held a conversation with him since.
I believe the easiest way to explain my view on dealing with any individual is, the old statement you are who you associate with. At my age I no longer want to associate with people. Who does not show strong integrity, integrity is a very distinct word. It is not a matter of what you do or what you have. It’s a matter of being truthful, and living up to your basic responsibilities and life. Questions I like to ask individuals to judge their integrity are simple how many days have you spent on bleachers watching your child in sports or practice. How many nights have you heard yourself say repeatedly to your child do your homework, how often do you check on the elderly person in your neighborhood just to make sure they’re okay. How much volunteer or charity work do you do to make your community a better place, and the big question that tells it all, is what you do in the dark suitable to be seen in the light? So back to my major dilemma and life do you deal with family members with no integrity.
Responsibility to friends let’s be very clear about this word friends in my whole life there are probably 15 people that I will truly call friends. These are the people who truly know the good and the bad about you and are always willing to pick up the phone at 2 o’clock in the morning to listen to your latest drama. These are the people you would trust with your children’s life, these are the people that you will drop anything for at any time and go see if they’re okay at any sign of trouble, some time you might wake up in the middle of the night after having a dream about a friend and call them at 4 AM in the morning to say are you okay, this person not only does not get mad truly appreciates that you tucked the time to check on them. So in my life these are the people I feel the most obligation to support and listen to, just due to the simple fact of what it takes for me to truly call somebody friend.
Responsibility to day-to-day individuals, truly goes back to if I feel that person has integrity.
How would one truly defined success or failure at love. It truly balls down to a couple of simple facts, when you wake up in the morning and look at the person next to you are you glad that they are there. When you are having a bad day or a great day is there only one person on your mind that you would like to tell your successes or failures to. When you hold that picture in your mind of being 90 years old and sitting on a porch, in a rocking chair with a little blanket over your legs to keep you warm, who do you see sitting next to you. Even though we like to think love should be the most complicated thing in the world, it is truly the simplest at the end of the day is the person you spend your time with the person you see sitting next to you when you take your last breath.
Communication — with a lateral thinker is one of my biggest fears in business, these individual like’s to have step-by-step instructions. With plenty of time to process thoughts. My natural communication style is one of a global thinker once I see how to get to the end, it becomes hard for me to understand why other people are still at the beginning. It’s taken me a long time to not be frustrated with lateral thinkers. I realize sometime I might just need to walk away and give them the necessary two or three weeks to work through their thought process.
Understanding my true place in business, it has taken me a long time to come to the conclusion that I am a fixer. In business there are three basic levels of any manager there are maintainers, fixers and innovators. My natural ability leads me to being a fixer. There is an old statement that always run through my mind when I am talking to a customer, when I’m evaluating any business problem. “If you can explain the problem an, a intelligent and understandable way, you already know the solution, you just don’t like the answer.” This has become the business statement that I live by, I believe my true fear in business is never becoming an innovator.